I never expected that too happen. I never expected you too miss me, to love me still. And you apologized nonetheless. How could I have ever thought that you would ever say the things you said. You hurt me, but then you still love me. I just do not understand. Maybe it is because I am still coping with what happened. I have not come to terms with it. Or maybe it is because I do not want to come to terms with it. You were the only reason I have faced it so far. I cannot even admit to myself that I still love you and that I miss you as well, so how is it you and I expect me to admit it to you? Neither of us see a reason to apologize for what happened, so I do not see us getting anywhere anytime soon. There is a huge flaw in wanting that to happen. Where trust does not exist is a prime place for a disaster, and that my dear is exactly what we have on our hands. A disastorous ending before it has even begun.
What my heart wants and what my brain is telling me to do are two completely different things. I do not understand what is going on. Maybe I do not want to understand. So much has happened that I do not know if I could trust you again, and you obviously feel the same. It is too bad that such a good friendship has to be lost over something so stupid yet so common: lies and mistrust.
What has the world come to these days?
Because I simply do not understand anything anymore.
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