I've come to find that many things in my life have a special meaning...but that meaning does not always stay the same for me. I was listening to Lifehouse's "Everything" and was moved, like I always am, while listening to it. And it got me to thinking. What is it that really makes me love this song? It surely isn't the meaning of the lyrics, because I've recently become skeptical of those meanings. I thought about it and I thought about it, and I finally came up with the answer.
It used to have a religious meaning with me. It no longer does. What this song represents to me is a way of remembering. It makes me think, even if it is subconsciously, about things that make me happy. Events. Places. People. And not only that, but it's the music. There's just something about the music that captivates me.
It represents the friendship I built with people those three short days at Antioch and how the love I developed for those people will never cease to exist, no matter where I am or who I become. It represents the mistakes I've made in my life, but how I've over come those mistakes as well. It represents my want, my need for the things that bring balance into my life. It represents all that makes me, me.
Whenever I listen to the song, I always have a mixture of emotions. Happiness. Yearning. Pain. It often brings me to tears, if I listen to it too closely. The words don't have much meaning, but the song itself has a much deeper meaning to me than most things that I've encountered lately. I've tried to avoid it because I don't want to remember. Even if some of them are happy memories, it just makes me think. And that upsets me because, a while ago, I had everything I could have wanted. So I've been thinking of those memories with spite and I get angry.
But one of my friends told me something. Something that I took to heart. It was along the lines of 'Just remember those memories fondly now that their gone because that's exactly what they are now...memories.'
Even though something is gone doesn't mean you have to take everything out on the world. I may not physically have everything I want in my life anymore, mainly people, but that doesn't mean I have to dwell on it. Things change and people leave you with memories. I've come to terms with that fact and, even though I may miss things so fiercely some times that I can't stand it, I have to remember those things in a good light. They're the only things I have.
It's funny how one song can make me feel so much and remember...everything.
"Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose."
~The Wonder Years
It used to have a religious meaning with me. It no longer does. What this song represents to me is a way of remembering. It makes me think, even if it is subconsciously, about things that make me happy. Events. Places. People. And not only that, but it's the music. There's just something about the music that captivates me.
It represents the friendship I built with people those three short days at Antioch and how the love I developed for those people will never cease to exist, no matter where I am or who I become. It represents the mistakes I've made in my life, but how I've over come those mistakes as well. It represents my want, my need for the things that bring balance into my life. It represents all that makes me, me.
Whenever I listen to the song, I always have a mixture of emotions. Happiness. Yearning. Pain. It often brings me to tears, if I listen to it too closely. The words don't have much meaning, but the song itself has a much deeper meaning to me than most things that I've encountered lately. I've tried to avoid it because I don't want to remember. Even if some of them are happy memories, it just makes me think. And that upsets me because, a while ago, I had everything I could have wanted. So I've been thinking of those memories with spite and I get angry.
But one of my friends told me something. Something that I took to heart. It was along the lines of 'Just remember those memories fondly now that their gone because that's exactly what they are now...memories.'
Even though something is gone doesn't mean you have to take everything out on the world. I may not physically have everything I want in my life anymore, mainly people, but that doesn't mean I have to dwell on it. Things change and people leave you with memories. I've come to terms with that fact and, even though I may miss things so fiercely some times that I can't stand it, I have to remember those things in a good light. They're the only things I have.
It's funny how one song can make me feel so much and remember...everything.
"Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose."
~The Wonder Years
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